Struggling to make sense...

First, let me say that my family's nightly prayers now include the parents of Sandy Hook, and will for some time.

There hasn't been a single story I've read on this unspeakable horror that hasn't caused me to pause to regain my composure before continuing. Last night I listened to the audio of a slain first grader's father, his voice cracking, saying that he and his wife don't know how to get through something like this. I wonder if any parent could ever get through such a thing. I can only guess that such a pain never leaves, it becomes a part of who you are. Each of us have young children. The idea that wrapped Christmas presents sit in closets, never to reach the child they were purchased for... it's a level of grief I simply can not wrap my mind around.

Titus I did find your post keenly insightful regarding the public reaction and the litany of historic school house murders. I expected for certain media and political quarters to blame "guns", but this time there does seem to be an added discussion regarding why this type of tragedy happens "only in America" as the mayor of New York put it. He's patently wrong by the way. You may remember the school bus massacre in Sweden (maybe it was Norway, but it was one of the high Western European countries) of only a few years ago.

First, I loathe such political discussions so soon after the parents of these slain children are just beginning to mourn the ultimate loss, but this must be said. I get it - the impulse Titus spoke of. The desire to find a concrete reason to blame, affix that blame, and move on. It feels safer. On the Left, point to a gun. Blame the gun. Support, pass and advocate the restriction of guns, keep your kids away from them in your own life, and you feel like you've exercised some measure of control. On the Right, point to movies and video games. Blame them. Advocate legislation restricting them. Ban them in your own home, and again you feel as if some measure of preventative control has been exercised. It feels safer. But that level of control is an illusion. Criminals, the insane, they don't care if you hang up a sign that decrees area x, y, or z "a gun free zone." Such zones, such laws, by definition only affect those willing to be law abiding. Criminals also don't care that violent video games come with a rating disclaimer. The terrifying fact is that responsible, loving parents sent their little children to school that day, never to see them again, and no law, no ordinance, no restriction can legislate the madmen from among us and guarantee such a thing wont happen again. Whatever legislation emerges from this tragedy, and I'm sure there will be some, will do nothing to prevent a killer from killing. And I'm not immune from such trains of thought. As a parent I am left groping for some measure of control to exercise. To say "okay, I did A and B, so C can't happen to my boys." Do I pull my sons from school? How about McDonalds? Should I ban them from all public places? How about forbid them from leaving our home? It's what I want to do, I'll be honest with you. Take away their first-person-shooter video games? Ban violent movies? Well Band of Brothers was certainly violent. Is that out too? In the end I must accept that their is no guaranteed way to protect what is most precious to me - my children. All I can do is be diligent about the common sense stuff, and tell them I love them an extra time each day. Ultimately, that's all I'm left with. After all, is there anything those parents wouldn't give for just one more I love you?