And they call Mormons a cult...

I've been wondering, since the President won reelection, about something. It's admittedly optimistic, but straws are all I have to grasp at while looking down the barrel of a 332-206 loss, right? Is it possible that this guy, this particular guy, Obama, was just impossible to beat? In other words, with everything that goes into his elections being "historic", the first black American elected president, his pop culture status, etc, etc, has it created a cult of personality that was incapable of defeat?

Lets consider these few explanations of his victory that may give us some hope that our fellow Americans aren't just butt-stupid...

1.) The popularity surrounding the personality of such cults is based on charisma, not results. This is the one politician that can can hang out with Jay-Z and George Clooney and still be the coolest guy in the room.

2.) An off-shoot of this personality cult theory - people voted for Obama for the same reason people drive hybrid or electric vehicles. They couldn't care less about performance, they like what their choice says about them... "I care", "I'm open-minded", "I'm cool too."

3.) Third, in my attempt to explain why he won without condemning 63 million Americans to embracing a socialist ideology, is our underestimation of the power of incumbency. In the last 100 years we (Republicans) have unseated a Democrat president only once, when Reagan beat Carter in 1980. Think about George W. Bush (by the way, Titus, he is not a "Jr."). The hatred for him in 2004 was vehement on the Left. Yet he won. And not only did he win, two years later in 06' his Party was demolished in congress. Which does not portend this overwhelming like of Republicans in general throughout the mid 2000's. Incumbents are tough to beat. In fact they have an impressive record, regardless of Party affiliation. The upside of that historical trend is we should do extremely well in the 2014 mid-terms.

Perhaps. and most probably, Obama's victory was a combination of all three. If you doubt it, ask yourself if the average, white, un-hip politician could have won reelection with these economic numbers. Does a Kerry, a Gore presidency survive the last four years? Like SNL said in their post election Obama parody, "Republicans, I can't believe you couldn't beat me. Unemployment is 8%, gas is $5, and I gave you a one debate head start." It's funny because it's true. Bare in mind that the same SNL episode portrayed Mitt Romney quailing his depression by going on a milk-drinking binge.

I said before the election that my only reservation about Romney's prospects was that this is now a nation which employs Paris Hilton via her popularity, purely via her popularity (I've also heard Obama called "President Kardashian"). And we just reelected the Paris of politics Commander-in-Chief.

But to be frank, I actually prefer to think 63,286,423 of my fellow Americans embraced Obama's "coolness" rather than his ideology. Under that scenario all we have to do is run a cool, suave, hip, good-looking conservative and we're a lock.

WOAH! ... I better clear my schedule!